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There are lots of fuckin' spelling mistakes, first. Then, I phoned my internet provider, because this message was supposed to come from them, but they had not made the mistake the message suggests, i.e. overbill me. These fuckers think everyone on the net is a moron. This is the link from these bastards : if you have Firefox, it is already reported as a phishing site :
http://lutfor.com/components/com_contact/views/contact/tmpl/fradsl/fr-adsl/index.php

I'm fed up of updating this shit, go directly to:

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Don't miss all the rest, or you'll die stupid !

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1. STYLE

This is a  first person narrative. The guy relates what happened to him in Australia, in a kind of non-committed fashion, which empathizes on the events, because of the discrepancy bteween the tone and the storyline
Fuckin' good sentence, innit ? Yeah, it is quite easy to read, and the narrator talks to you as if you were his old buddy and could commiserate to his misadventures. Because he was too fuckin' stupid in the first place.

2. PLOT

It is a very simple story : a guy is really bored and can't see any other way than to go to Australia to get some new material for his job, because he is a jounalist of sorts. It begins like a sort of fantasy story. He goes into the old bookshop, a book sems to attract his attention, and so on and so forth. He lands there, hire a kinda VW hippie van, the likes you can see in any fuckin' Woodstock documentary, you know, with doped hippies laughing their asses out from the top of them, pretending to play folk guitars to get laid with stupid-looking hippie bitches and painted with big red and green and yellow and blue and purple flowers everywhere. The van, of course, but maybe also the bitches.

As for bitches, he meets the ultimate one, unfortunately for him. Her name is Angie and of course she just looks like one. But inside she is the wickedest fuckin' nasty whore that Australia has ever given birth to. She just crashes on him, gets him doped on fuckin' and some drugged beer and kidnaps him.

And then he realizes she has chosen him for her mate and taken her back into the deepest asshole of the bush to live with her and her nasty family, full of the most complete degenerates you can find anywhere inthe universe.

They have a kind of kangaroo-meat plant. They kill them, eviscerate them and prepare the meat to be sold. They are all fuckin' retards, the likes of which you can see in any Chainsaw Massacre film.

But he will eventually find an ally, in the person of his stepsister, because she desperately wants to be out of the place and away from her insane family. And feels guilty for them all.

3. CHARACTERS

The narrator is a total naive guy at the start of the story, but he gradually hardens and has to withstand lots of nasty practical jokes from the girl's family.

Of course there is the total bitch called Angie, who just wants to raise a child by herself and have her "husband" behaves like her slave. She is the embodiment of everything negative in a female character. One can just wonder if she has been modelled on an actual person, and wish this person has died a horrible death.

Then there is Krystal, her sister. She is the other side of femininty. She just said to the narrator : "And the morning  I saw you emerge from the chicken coop... I knew that I'd have to get you out of here."

 

4. MESSAGE

There is no real message to extract from this story, in my opinion. Maybe just a bunch of warnings against not being too credulous in front of women, and how they can be both self-denyingly great in the case of Krystal, because she dies while helping the narrator successfully escape, or how bitchy and really cruel they can also be. But I think men themselves can behave both ways like that.

 

5. CRITICISM

This story really grips you from the start and you cannot put down the book before you know what will eventually happen, whether the hero will get his ass out from this hellhole or not, and what will happen to the fuckin' bitch in the end, whether she will get her big punishment coming or not.

And there is a final twist in the way of a dream that gives the reader the creeps a final time.

This was a good read and the only regret of mine is that it was much too short to my liking, which is a great praise for any book.

 

Don't miss my other totally awesome posts about books :

American Gods, by Neil Gaiman
The Perfume, by Patrick Süsskind
Unseen Academicals, by Terry Pratchett
Slob, by Rex Miller
Pygmy, by Chuck Palahniuk
American Psycho, by Brett Easton Ellis
Life of Pi, by Yann Martel
Men are better than women, by Dick Masterson

Don't miss all the rest, or you'll die stupid !

MOVIES PAGE, BILLY BOY ! SO THAT YOU MIGH GET A CLUE ABOUT THE BEST SHIT TO DOWNLOAD, HEY ?!
GADGETS PAGE, DUDE ! DON'T WANT TO BE COOL WITH NEW SHIT ?
TV SERIES PAGE, SHITTER ! HAVE YOUR FIX OF IDIOT BOX NONSENSE !
MUSIC PAGE, BUDDY ! CHICKS LOVE TO LISTEN TO SHIT ABOUT ROCK STARS !
PEOPLE PAGE, MY MAN ! BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY WITH THIS COOL SHIT ABOUT INTERESTING DUDES !
PETS PAGE, HANDSOME ! EVEN YOUR TAX GATHERER LOVES THEM !
RANDOM HATE PAGE, FELLA ! BECAUSE YOU LOVE TO HATE PEOPLE AND SHIT !
VIDEO GAMES PAGE, GOV'NOR ! EVERTYHING EXPLAINED, ESPECIALLY WHY YOU SUCK SO MUCH AT THEM !
WEB SHIT PAGE, BUTTHEAD ! SNAZZY PICS AND STORIES GALORE STOLEN FROM EVERYWHERE !
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1.Take your time. You have got plenty of it.
2.Think about all the cool people you are going to meet.
3.Make a list of all the nasty people you are going to haunt.
4.Mentally connect with the other cemetery patrons.
5.See ? Internet is free when you are dead.
6.Do not worry about your weight anymore.
7.Have yourself buried with sunglasses in case of blinding white light at the end of a tunnel.
8.Prepare for next reincarnation, as situation requires.
9.Choose your spirit friends. Do not let them choose you.
10.Perhaps you will meet the Travel Agent, perhaps you will not.

I'm fed up of updating this shit, go directly to:

MOVIES PAGE, BILLY BOY ! SO THAT YOU MIGHT GET A CLUE ABOUT THE BEST SHIT TO DOWNLOAD, HEY ?!

Don't miss all the rest, or you'll die stupid !

TV SERIES PAGE, SHITTER ! HAVE YOUR FIX OF IDIOT BOX NONSENSE !
BOOK PAGE, MAN ! KNOW HOW TO READ OR WHAT ?
GADGETS PAGE, DUDE ! DON'T WANT TO BE COOL WITH NEW SHIT ?
MUSIC PAGE, BUDDY ! CHICKS LOVE TO LISTEN TO SHIT ABOUT ROCK STARS !
PEOPLE PAGE, MY MAN ! BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY WITH THIS COOL SHIT ABOUT INTERESTING DUDES !
PETS PAGE, HANDSOME ! EVEN YOUR TAX GATHERER LOVES THEM !
RANDOM HATE PAGE, FELLA ! BECAUSE YOU LOVE TO HATE PEOPLE AND SHIT !
VIDEO GAMES PAGE, GOV'NOR ! EVERTYHING EXPLAINED, ESPECIALLY WHY YOU SUCK SO MUCH AT THEM !
WEB SHIT PAGE, BUTTHEAD ! SNAZZY PICS AND STORIES GALORE STOLEN FROM EVERYWHERE !
GENIUS THOUGHTS CORNER, LUV !IT DOESN'T HURT TO THINK, AIN'T IT ?
LINUX PAGE, GENIUS ! THE BEST OPERATING FUCKIN' SYSTEM FOR COMPUTERS IN THE WORLD, POSSIBLY !

1. I AM STILL LOOKING FOR THE MOST CONVENIENT WINDOW MANAGER

Linux is cool. Linux is even cooler when you have been using it for 6 years or more like myself.
Because now, I know more or less how not to get stuck with trivial annoyances which made me, as might have been the case for most users out there :

REINSTALL THE FUCKIN' DISTRO !

Hell ! At first it is fun. Then it gets on your nerves. And Linux might not keep on being so cool. AFTER ALL.

Now let's get down to fuckin' window managers.

2. THE HEAVYWEIGHTS: KDE AND GNOME (part 1)

First, why do I even bother writing blog posts about Linux, and presently, window managers ? Well, to be honest, I really can't help myself doing it.

There was a time when I could not make heads nor tails of Linux, but I really wanted to move away from Windows, which was becoming a real pain with viruses and assorted shit.

I had owned Macs before, when I was a bit richer, but I have become increasingly poorer, like perhaps some people, nowadays. So, Macs were out of question.
What's more, I really like to keep things as long as I can. And people, too. For instance, I would not like getting rid of my mother yet, or my sister (although for the latter, I could sometimes have second thoughts and have daydreams of selling her at the nearest slave market). So it is the same for machines. Because machines are fascinating, aren't they ?

I always wonder how my fuckin' car can still run after 16 years of obediently driving my ass everywhere and sometimes quite far.

The same for my computers. I have quite old ones. Linux helped me to keep them alive. Sometimes I wish I could install an older version of Toyota in my Toyota, because I think the one I have now is too new for me !

3. THE HEAVYWEIGHTS : KDE AND GNOME (part 2)

Sorry for being so verbose, because I did not talk about either of the window managers I presented in the title.

GNOME : I don't like it.

Why ? Because it looks like an old version of a bad Mac interface. I like OLD, okay. But not TOO old. And Gnome is ugly, too.

And there are no gnomes anywhere. I like gnomes, like those you can see in the Lord of the Rings and shit fantasy novels of that kind. They look ugly, too. That might be the reason why this window manager is impractical and looks terrible.

KDE : I like it.

Why ? Because it looks good, better than the newest Windows interface. The problem is, it is very greedy in resources, so not very ecological and shit. So I installed KDE light. Yeah, just like the cigarettes and the soy butter. It is better for my old Dell laptop's health.

It is good because you have lots of options to customize the look and feel of the interface. It is even so good that you end up doing just that : customizing. Because in fact, there is not much more to do in Linux than playing with the interface, programs being so few and shit.

4. THE LITTLE GUYS : TILING MANAGERS AND OTHERS

I like tiled floor. It is much better than wood floor or plastic shit floor.

It seems  that tiling managers are the same. They are really good because you save a lot of resources when you use them, and they are hard to use.

But you cannot do all you can in KDE. Because there are no options for customzing anything. You are stuck with a very basic way of changing the focus from one window to another, for instance.

I have used ratpoison and wm and others. They are good for people who like using one or two programs at the same time, like me. Unfortunately, these programs are mostly terminal windows, in which linux geeks type lots of arcane commands, which are not useful for non-geeks like me.

5. CONCLUSION

I really like writing unreliable and uninformed articles like this one, about Linux. Because I really don't know shit about it, but like it anyway. So if you expect me to write others like this one, you won't be disappointed.

I'm fed up of updating this shit, go directly to:

MOVIES PAGE, BILLY BOY ! SO THAT YOU MIGHT GET A CLUE ABOUT THE BEST SHIT TO DOWNLOAD, HEY ?!

Don't miss all the rest, or you'll die stupid !

TV SERIES PAGE, SHITTER ! HAVE YOUR FIX OF IDIOT BOX NONSENSE !
BOOK PAGE, MAN ! KNOW HOW TO READ OR WHAT ?
GADGETS PAGE, DUDE ! DON'T WANT TO BE COOL WITH NEW SHIT ?
MUSIC PAGE, BUDDY ! CHICKS LOVE TO LISTEN TO SHIT ABOUT ROCK STARS !
PEOPLE PAGE, MY MAN ! BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY WITH THIS COOL SHIT ABOUT INTERESTING DUDES !
PETS PAGE, HANDSOME ! EVEN YOUR TAX GATHERER LOVES THEM !
RANDOM HATE PAGE, FELLA ! BECAUSE YOU LOVE TO HATE PEOPLE AND SHIT !
VIDEO GAMES PAGE, GOV'NOR ! EVERTYHING EXPLAINED, ESPECIALLY WHY YOU SUCK SO MUCH AT THEM !
WEB SHIT PAGE, BUTTHEAD ! SNAZZY PICS AND STORIES GALORE STOLEN FROM EVERYWHERE !
GENIUS THOUGHTS CORNER, LUV !IT DOESN'T HURT TO THINK, AIN'T IT ?
LINUX PAGE, GENIUS ! THE BEST OPERATING FUCKIN' SYSTEM FOR COMPUTERS IN THE WORLD, POSSIBLY !

1. Admiration

Enough black muscle to tear you in half if he happens to sneeze ten metres from you. Yeah. Black power with a set of vampire eyeteeth to behead faggot Anne Rice vampires in a jiffy and zap their corpses into a zillion tiny particles of shit. BEFORE they even catch fire. Like that.

2. Plot

Blade is a mean vampire-killing machine. Because he is a bloodsucker himself. BUT, he is a half-blood, pun intended and all. He even zeroes his own motherfuckin' mother, the dirty bitch who wanted to seduce him.

Freud, you dirty mind-poker, shut up !. No, Blade didn't lay his mother. Because he has to fight his father. Or perhaps it is Oedipus story all over. Who cares ? Anyway, the white trash vampire, the real baddie, wants to become some God of Blood or whatever.

Problem is, Blade has a fatal flaw. Just like in them ol' tragedies the Greek trannies wrote. And the flaw's name is Kris Kristofferson. Bugger always gets in the way, until he finally kills himself. Good riddance.

Then it's vampire Armageddon all over. The cold-blooded bastards get their arses whipped, they merrily explode in joyful sparks of vampire shit. Until the two star opponents meet in a kind of Temple of Doom which is very deep. There's even a sequence with flying needles filled with blue gunk that auto-pump into the white trash's head when Blade kicks them. Then white trashy explodes !!!. Fun and entrails all over the place !!!

3. Mistakes

Save for the Kristofferson character, who has a limp and is fucking pathetic, this would have been an okay flick. Even the black lady scientist with the sexy eyes was fuckable. Alas, for Kris' sake !

4. Conclusion

Rating : 2.7678 out of 10

I'm fed up of updating this shit, go directly to:

MOVIES PAGE, BILLY BOY ! SO THAT YOU MIGHT GET A CLUE ABOUT THE BEST SHIT TO DOWNLOAD, HEY ?!

Don't miss all the rest, or you'll die stupid !

TV SERIES PAGE, SHITTER ! HAVE YOUR FIX OF IDIOT BOX NONSENSE !
BOOK PAGE, MAN ! KNOW HOW TO READ OR WHAT ?
GADGETS PAGE, DUDE ! DON'T WANT TO BE COOL WITH NEW SHIT ?
MUSIC PAGE, BUDDY ! CHICKS LOVE TO LISTEN TO SHIT ABOUT ROCK STARS !
PEOPLE PAGE, MY MAN ! BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY WITH THIS COOL SHIT ABOUT INTERESTING DUDES !
PETS PAGE, HANDSOME ! EVEN YOUR TAX GATHERER LOVES THEM !
RANDOM HATE PAGE, FELLA ! BECAUSE YOU LOVE TO HATE PEOPLE AND SHIT !
VIDEO GAMES PAGE, GOV'NOR ! EVERTYHING EXPLAINED, ESPECIALLY WHY YOU SUCK SO MUCH AT THEM !
WEB SHIT PAGE, BUTTHEAD ! SNAZZY PICS AND STORIES GALORE STOLEN FROM EVERYWHERE !
GENIUS THOUGHTS CORNER, LUV !IT DOESN'T HURT TO THINK, AIN'T IT ?
LINUX PAGE, GENIUS ! THE BEST OPERATING FUCKIN' SYSTEM FOR COMPUTERS IN THE WORLD, POSSIBLY !